Friends and Money: How to Handle 4 Tough Scenarios (2023)

FAQs

What not to say to a financially struggling person? ›

Your offer of help is exhausting your resources.

If assisting someone else is overtaxing your time, energy, or resources—stop! Even if you agreed to do something, if the cost becomes too great, whether that's financial or emotional, you can back out or adjust how much you can help.

Some options include telling the person directly that you are ending the friendship. Or, you might allow the friendship to fade away by communicating less over time. If someone is violating your boundaries or if you feel unsafe, you might choose to discontinue all communication with them immediately.

Does money affect friendship? ›

If you make less than your friends, you may feel less-than; make more and you risk taking on too many financial favors or coming across as out of touch. Nearly half of millennial and Gen Z respondents in a 2017 PayPal survey cited money as impacting a friendship.

Let's recap: The golden rule is don't spend more than you earn, and focus on what you can keep. Maybe it sounds obvious, but you'd be surprised at how many people don't understand or follow this rule and end up in debt. Look at credit card use as an example.

Provide purses for yourselves that will not wear out, a treasure in heaven that will never fail, where no thief comes near and no moth destroys.” Jesus looked at him and loved him. “One thing you lack,” he said. “Go, sell everything you have and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven.

Try to empathize with them to understand WHY they want the money, WHY it is important to them, WHY they believe it will change their lives for the better. Proposal: Based on what you heard, make a sound proposal, with an open heart. Make sure you are being fair, or perhaps more than fair: generous.

Jumping right to the big topics

Once you get comfortable with that, start discussing more long-term goals, or why you each have the spending habits you do. “Then you can start to build a solid money future,” Bressington says. And rest assured, money is one of those normal fights that even happy couples have.

Money can bring up a lot of emotions: anxiety, guilt, envy, or even hope. At mindbodygreen we feel that to be truly well, the relationships in your life need to be in balance, and that includes having a healthy relationship with money.

It's totally normal to experience jealousy in any close relationship, including friendships. It's usually related to our own fears or insecurities, such as the fear of being replaced, abandoned, or betrayed. These negative thoughts can lead to stronger emotions like anger, anxiety and sadness.

Listen to how they feel

Having a chance to talk could help them feel calmer and more able to deal with their stress. Being there for them and listening without judging them can help. [My friends can help by] making me a cup of tea, holding me while I cry, making me laugh...

How do you help a friend who is spiraling? ›

In addition to listening, one simple way to help someone in the midst of an anxiety spiral is to ask calming questions. Dr. Aslinia suggests: "How are you feeling?"; "What's the worst thing that could happen?"; "Do you have a plan for this?"; and "Tell me what happens next," or "Walk me through your plan."

Words of encouragement and strength for a friend

This crappy time you're going through is making you stronger and I just know you'll get through this. Let me help you build up your strength to feel better. Give yourself grace. You do not have to be perfect right now.

Mayo Clinic. With this mind, we can reasonably define money dysmorphia as: Dissatisfaction associated with one or more perceived defects or flaws in our finances — a flaw that appears minor or can't be seen by others.

Poor mindset convinces people that their circumstances are fixed and that living paycheck to paycheck is the best they can do. They think that there's not much they can do to improve their circumstances.

Financial bullying occurs in a committed relationship when one partner uses his or her power or influence to control the other financially. Financial bullies use tactics such as: Making his or her partner feel guilty about purchases. Limiting monthly spending. Making his or her partner show receipts for all purchases.

Such habits amount to what money experts call "financial infidelity." "Things like being overly secretive with your money, lying about spending and refusing to share financial information with you are red flags," Victoria said. Financial abuse can also occur in relationships.

For those unfamiliar with the term, financial intimacy is when you know about your partner's financial footing and both are comfortable discussing each other's finances. You both are financially compatible and you don't need to hide your expenses, savings or even your credit score from each other.

Money problems can cause drama in the relationship, which can lead to it ending. The quality of life will go down if the two of you live in poverty, and not everyone wants that. And if the person doesn't want to improve, or get on the same page, it can be difficult to live with them.

What is more important than money in a relationship? ›

Relationships matter more than money. It is not enough to have talent and skills; you must understand the power of building valuable relationships. Relationships matter more than money. In actual sense, people don't lack money, it is relationship they lack.

The currency should be separated into slots by denomination, portrait side up, with all facing in the same direction. The highest denomination should always be on the left, decreasing to the smallest on the far right. Coins should follow the same pattern, with the highest on the left, decreasing to the right.

It should actually be respect first, followed by power, and finally, money, but I guess that wouldn't sound too catchy in a song. The reason why the money, power, respect path is flawed is because typically, when you put money above all, it translates into ego and hatred, not power and respect.

People with a positive money attitude generally spend less than they earn, save for the future, manage their credit, give to others and plan for unexpected expenses. If you have negative money beliefs that are preventing you from reaching your full potential, it's possible to unlearn those beliefs.

Even if you've been friends with someone for a long time, people can grow apart or no longer put equal effort and care into the relationship. If you can't count on them, or feel like you're doing all the work to maintain the friendship, it's okay to go with your gut and cut it off.

Why money ruins friendships? ›

One of the fastest ways to ruin a friendship is loaning money to a friend. That's because if the friend doesn't pay you back, the friendship is likely over, since the trust that cements a friendship will be permanently jackhammered into rubble.

“Toxic friendships happen when one person is being emotionally harmed or used by another, making the relationship more of a burden than support,” says Suzanne Degges-White, author of Toxic Friendships. A bad friendship can increase your blood pressure, lower your immunity, and affect your mental health.

Lead by example and share your own financial problems.

Instead of directing and telling someone what they should do, model the behaviour you think would help that person. Share your experiences and challenges openly. Share a story of how you were able to resist buying something you didn't really need.

Offering financial help can be a great show of care to the people you're close to, as long as you decenter yourself and keep an open mind about what form that aid can take.

Peer pressure, boredom, marketing offers, credit cards and ignoring petty expenses can lead to breaking your budget, experts say. Overspending will always have a negative effect on your budget.

Overspending can happen for different reasons, such as: You might spend to make yourself feel better. Some people describe this as feeling like a temporary high. If you experience symptoms like mania or hypomania, you might spend more money or make impulsive financial decisions.

What do you say to someone who is struggling with life? ›

Broke is living paycheck to paycheck with no savings intact. Broke is being in debt up to your eyeballs. Broke is buying a brand-new $30,000 car because you can “afford” the monthly payments but not having enough in your bank account to cover a $1,000 emergency.

The amount of money needed to be considered financially stable is subjective and depends on a person's individual situation. But generally, having a net worth of $1 million or more can indicate that someone is financially stable or secure and has a good grasp of money management.